A World Without Emotions

 “One ought to hold on to one's heart; for if one lets it go, one soon loses control of the head too.”  

― Friedrich Nietzsche  

  

For several years, I have been a true believer in the terms above.  

Much of the time, I tried not to get swept away by feelings. I felt that having feelings to make choices for you will lead you to uncomfortable places and away from true, rational solutions.  

I pictured a world of no emotions. I always longed for a world without emotions. No joy, no sorrow, no irritation, no surprise, no hate, no passion. Oh, nothing.  

But a few days ago, when I had a dream that one of my cousins was gone, I was compelled to think about emotions.  

The dream has no clear starting point. It begins with my cousin's passing, with me crying in sorrow.  

To no point, I see myself weeping.  

While I sit around the dead body of my brother, I feel terrified and lonely. 

 

Confused on how to tell my family about death, I spent a week hiding it from them before I tried to confess.  

I was nervous about how the news would be handled.  

My sister is the first person I go to. They are around the same age—my cousin and my sister. So, telling her about it first, somehow, made sense. 

 

Crying and shaky, when I go and tell her that our brother is no more, she looks up from her phone, nods a little and, goes back to everything she's been doing. Displaying no sentiment.  

Surprised and puzzled, I go to the kitchen, where the cousin's parents are preparing food for the family.  

I tell them about death too.  

They stare at me blankly for a few seconds and then inform me that the food was ready, and before eating, I should go wash my hands.  

This startled and terrified me. I couldn't comprehend how they were so emotionless and untouched.  

I tried to make them feel sad and guilty for the loss, but there was no feeling I could see in them.  

After this, I wake up thinking about how weird a dream it was and that it will quickly leave my mind.  

Yet it hasn't. I can’t stop wondering how a world would be without emotions.  

We wouldn’t be happy about our achievements and all the good news. We won’t be sad about our losses and all the bad news.   

We won’t be angry when something we desire doesn’t happen. We wouldn’t be excited when something we have waited for a long time is going to happen. 

We wouldn’t be afraid of anything scary. We wouldn’t be disgusted by anything weird.  

Oh. We would feel nothing.   

I thought I would like a world like that. I thought I wanted a world like that. A world where everything would be based on logic and statistics. Emotions wouldn’t be there to mess things up.  

But the more I think about it, the more I realize that I do not want to give up feeling happy after seeing a bowl of noodles and I do not want to give up feeling sad when I see Hazel Grace Lancaster having to live without Augustus Waters.  

Without emotions, we would be a world of robots. Although I am not against robots, I do not want to be one and I certainly do not want to live among them forever.    

No matter how chaotic emotions make our life, without them, we wouldn’t be the same and not better.   

The empathy we show to people, the anger, the happiness, the disgust, the fear, the embarrassment, the excitement, the pride. All these feelings make us who we are: Humans. Emotions are to be grateful for.